Vongola's Lethal Road Trip
by Skylark18
Summary: A family road trip is meant to be relaxing and fun, but Tsuna's dysfunctional family may prove that wrong.


**A/N: After finally updating Yellow Pompom Chronicles, I decide to go ahead and start another story. Aren't I just _such_ a great author (sarcasm)? Well, truth to be told, I actually wrote this a few weeks _before _I started on YPC (which only means that the quality of the story is horrendously worse due to the assistance of my disgustingly limited vocabulary and less-than-stellar writing ability of that time). I just decided to upload it since the plot was so flexible and there was so much you could do with it.

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First Stop- Who's driving?

When summer vacation had finally began, Tsuna was looking forward to spending his time lazing around, hanging out with Gokudera and Yamamoto, and hopefully finishing his homework on time. Unfortunately, Reborn had other things in mind.

"Tsuna, the Vongola are going on a road trip," Reborn mentioned on the morning of the first day of summer break, "I've informed your mother that you're participating in an exchange program so she won't worry about your whereabouts. Since it's summer break, we have to use this time to train you until your bones bleed, and since it's impossible for bones to bleed, you'll never stop training. Pack your things and get ready in thirty minutes."

"Hiee!?" Tsuna exclaimed in surprise and confusion, "Why didn't you tell me this before? Doesn't this mean that everyone else will be coming too? Including Mukuro and Hibari-san? I can't get ready in just thirty minutes either! We don't even have a car! Anyways, none of us have driver's licenses and you're too short to reach the pedals...or the steering wheel! Who'll drive? And now that I think about it, why would we need to go on a road trip--"

Reborn promptly stuffed a bar of soap into his students mouth to cease his ranting, "Your questions will be answered eventually. All you have to do right now is to get ready. You have ten minutes."

Tsuna spat out the soap and rubbed his mouth with the back of his hand, "But you said a while ago that I had _thirty_ minutes!"

It was too late though, Reborn had already fallen asleep. Without much other choice, Tsuna immediately rushed to his room to get ready. In ten minutes, he was dragging his luggage out the door. Tsuna panted as he struggled to carry his baggage outside despite the fact that it didn't actually weight much, but then again the boy's arm strength was questionable.

When Tsuna finally did arrive outside though, he was surprised to see that each member of the Vongola guardians were, in fact, there with their luggage as well (including Hibari and Mukuro). However, what caught his attention was the prominent and ridiculous looking van parked behind them. It was an unsuitable shade of puke green that would be very much of an eyesore on the streets with headlights shaped like lizard eyes. The whole thing was far too rotund and resembled more of a bullet than a car. In fact, the vehicle's appearance was similar to Leon and Tsuna noted that the green gecko seemed to be missing from Reborn's hat as well.

"You turned Leon into a car?" Tsuna questioned with incredulity after putting his almost non-existent problem solving skills to use.

Reborn ignored him and instead ordered, "Now that the lazy-ass that's been keeping us waiting is here, it's time to begin our road trip. Everybody board Leon."

Gokudera and Yamamoto walked up to Tsuna and positioned themselves on either side of him.

"Jyuudaime! I'm glad you made it. Reborn said that this road trip would be a chance to prove my worthiness as your right hand man!" Gokudera exuberantly pronounced.

"Haha! I came 'cause I thought it'd be fun!" Yamamoto chuckled sheepishly as he scratched the back of his head, "You sure are dedicated, Gokudera!"

"Shut up, baseball freak," Gokudera seethed, ignoring the fact that he actually received a compliment, "Why is someone as ignorant as you one of Jyuudaime's guardians?"

Tsuna sighed as he listened to the one-sided argument between his friends. Before he knew it, He was seated in the back of the Leon-van between Gokudera and Yamamoto with Reborn perched on his shoulder and Lambo on his other shoulder, yelling at Reborn. Hibari was seated in the middle row by himself since he threatened to bite to death anyone who sat next to him. Ryohei sat in the passenger seat with his head craning out of the window yelling "Extreme road trip!". Of course, that left only one person to drive. Unfortunately, that person was Mukuro Rokudo.

"Reborn, are you _sure_ Mukuro can drive?" Tsuna asked Reborn nervously before they were about to take off.

"Mukuro had to travel by numerous motored vehicles while escaping from the Estraneo family," Reborn stated, subtly avoiding actually answering the question.

It became obvious why Reborn had not provided a direct answer a moment later when Mukuro actually started the engine and drove. He rammed the acceleration pedal and the Leon-van shot forward with a lunge. Tsuna felt his seat belt dig into his stomach and Lambo also fell off his shoulder, landing on the floor in a heap before bursting out crying.

"T-tolerate..." Lambo sniffed as he pulled out the ten year bazooka.

"Wait!" Tsuna cried out, "Lambo! Don't shoot! We can't fit--"

It was too late though. The childish thunder guardian had pulled the trigger, and in a puff of smoke, TYL Lambo had replaced him. The back of the Leon-van was definitely not designed for so many people. The now older Lambo had one foot propped up against Yamamoto's shoulder, and one on the back of the seat next to Hibari's. He ended up sitting in Tsuna's lap with his head against Gokudera's arm. Reborn had escaped this catastrophe by jumping over the seats to situate himself on Mukuro's shoulder instead.

"Eh? Where did the pretty senorita go?" Lambo questioned with confusion as he looked around.

While all this was occurring, Mukuro was driving at 200mph, barely rounding the corners, and scraping against numerous unidentified objects. The only ones who didn't seem to mind the ride were Reborn and Ryohei, who still had his head out the window and was still screaming "Extreme road trip!".

"Hie! Somebody stop this!" Tsuna pleaded as he tried to shove a certain cow-print wearing man off of his lap.

Luckily, his prayers were answered when Hibari reached over Mukuro's shoulder and shut off the engine, "If you can't drive then don't, stupid herbivore."

"Well, Chikusa was always the one who drove when we were escaping from the Estraneo anyways," Mukuro sighed as he ran his hand through his hair, "I don't know why Reborn asked me to drive. Besides, I see that I'm not welcomed here," He glanced at Hibari.

Thus, Mukuro reverted back into Chrome who sat there, blinked twice, and then murmured a soft "ah".

"Reborn! What were you thinking!" Tsuna wailed at the infantile hitman.

"I wanted to test your ability to stay calm in dangerous situations," Reborn excused himself although the obvious truth was that he enjoyed torturing Tsuna, "Unfortunately, Mukuro is now unable to drive. It doesn't matter though since Leon has a built in auto-pilot."

"You should of used that in the beginning, infant," Hibari growled, also displeased with the situation.

"No matter," Reborn brushed off the comment, "We'll stop for a while to reorient ourselves. I also want to make a few changes to the seating plans..."

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A while later, Tsuna concluded that Reborn's seating plans...totally sucked. Reborn claimed the driver's seat _and_ the passenger's seat, despite the fact that he was the smallest person (Lambo's afro makes him larger than Reborn). At first, he had intended to bind Lambo on the roof of the car, but after Tsuna's constant begging, he resolved to only tie him up and throw him in the trunk. In the back, he seated Gokudera between Yamamoto and Ryohei. Gokudera and Ryohei were furious with the arrangement and began arguing before they even sat down. The worst scenario though, was the one that befell Tsuna. He was in the middle row, sitting with two other people. Normally this would not be a problem, however, the middle row in the Leon-van was designed for _only_ two people. In addition, he was sitting next to Hibari and Chrome, who could turn into Mukuro at any time. So poor unfortunate Tsuna was squished into a cramped space with the two most dangerous people in the vehicle.

Tsuna whimpered at his awful luck. He tried to stick closer to Chrome, desperately making all efforts to avoid physical contact with Hibari. Unfortunately, the car took a sudden sharp turn to the left, causing Chrome to fall into our unfortunate protagonist who, despite all his futile attempts not to, tumbled into the menacing cloud guardian. Hibari glared at the younger boy who whimpered and backed away, hurriedly clearing himself of the dangerous prefect's vicinity.

"Why does it have to be me?!" Tsuna sobbed as he grabbed the back of Reborn's seat, "Why are we even on this trip?!"

Tsuna was truly unfortunate though, for Reborn had fallen asleep already.

"I should really put him on coffee, " Tsuna muttered grumpily as he resigned himself to gazing at the intricate designs on the floor mat, "Or maybe poison."

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**A/N: I made a few corrections to the original story, but it's still taking a lot for** **me to restrain myself from smashing my head into my keyboard. Evidently, I'm not so fond of my previous linguistic skills (and in the future I will most undoubtedly find my current ability absolutely abhorrent).** **Regardless, please attempt to ignore the unbearable aura of amateur reeking from this chapter and review.**


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